The Election I

I don't know what to say. It's been two weeks since the election and I still don't quite know what happened. Part of me saw this coming. Most of me didn't believe it was possible. 

During the primaries, I predicted that Donald Trump would not be selected by the Republican Party, that he would be passed over for one of the less popular men running. But that did not happen. 

Then I predicted that he would either drop out of the race or that the American people would sober up and realize the utter ridiculousness of this election. But that did not happen.

By the time I got home on election night, it was 7:00 PM. Trump was already leading significantly. I watched the vote count on Google while listening to NPR. I felt sick to my stomach; at one point, I  thought my dinner was going to revisit me. I had hope that Hillary Clinton was going to pull through. The next morning, my alarm went off and the first thing I heard was NPR announcing Trump's victory. I actually waited for the man on the radio to say, "Haha, just kidding!" But when that did not happen, I became overwhelmed by feelings of disbelief, fear, and anger. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross' emotions of grieving are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.[1]  I now float somewhere between denial, anger, and depression.What I'm grieving for, I'm still not sure.

The election, on many levels, was deeply personal. And worse yet, I don't know to whom I can talk because this election has bred such strong feelings of intolerance. I no longer feel safe talking to some people without fear of a backlash. A lot of people I know have ignored bringing up the election, as if it has no effect on their life. But, as a woman, and member of a population that still is treated like a minority, it has a direct effect on my life. And, part of the reason it is difficult to discuss is that a lot of people, no matter how progressive they might be, struggle to fully comprehend how an election can have a dramatic effect on an individual's life. So it's been gradually eating away at me until I can no longer stand it.  

I will admit that I did not like Clinton initially. She was associated with an old fashioned political strategy that I just did not want. And, unfortunately, her husband's presidency single-handedly enhanced the structure of institutionalized racism that exists in the US prison system today.[2][3] These two factors made it difficult for me, my peers and people of color to follow.[4] Then there was the ongoing, yet somehow nonexistent, crimes she committed through email.[5][6][7][8] 

But after sifting through all of that, especially in comparison to Trump's allegations of sexual assault and fraud, I realized I had bought into a shallow attempt to "scandalize" a woman who has the potential to be POTUS.[9][10][11][12][13] It's a cruel and convoluted retelling of Hester Prynne's life in Nathaniel Hawthorne's The Scarlet Letter.[14][15][16][17] Or, if a person lives in a world only of men, Trump may be Prynne.

When I look at Trump, and hear what he says regarding women, I become scared in a way that I've never felt before. The world for women is already one that is unsafe and where fact is perceived as exaggeration. Many women, if not most, can attest that sexual assault and domestic abuse are rampant in a lot of ways that many men (and some women) are unable to see. I think a lot of women would agree that sexism is on the rise. The tension is real and becoming more unstable. When I consider Trump as POTUS, I start to predict, not imagine, how much worse it will be for women. Trump has already run a campaign against women that is equivalent to Emperor Kuzco selecting a bride. 

A lot of men and women may look at the argument of sexism and either decide they themselves are not sexist and it does not apply to them, or that it is a ridiculous excuse for being a sore loser. The worst part of sexism is that women have been raised to be the harshest critics against women. Women prevent themselves from moving past discrimination. Sexism is this complex web of outside attacks and self destruction; its power is not an easy concept to grasp.

In helping me communicate all of this, I've put together a list of human rights that are violated on a daily basis against women. Sometimes it's difficult to see the magnitude of a problem when it's not presented with overwhelming evidence, hence my (beautifully created) footnotes in Chicago format.

1. Right to equality.

Looks like: designating roles and jobs for certain sexes, one sex is forced to shoulder both career and home lives, not earning a job and compensation based on equivalent credentials. 

Sounds like: "I bet you make a great wife." - Trump

2. Freedom from discrimination.

Looks like: an unrealistic expectation or disallowing a woman equal access.

Sounds like: women who are never taught how to navigate taxes and insurance. "You have to treat 'em like shit." - Trump

3. Right to life, liberty, personal security.

Looks like: taking away feelings of safety; having to choose behaviors, clothing, and attitude that will not "ask" for unwanted attention.

Sounds like: catcalling, rape jokes. "26,000 unreported sexual assaults in the military - only 238 convictions. What did these geniuses expect to happen when they put men and women together?" - Trump

4. Freedom from torture and degrading treatment.

Looks like: domestic abuse; violent, verbal and/or emotional.

Sounds like: Megyn Kelly's accusations of sexual harassment against Trump and Roger Ailes.“You could see there was blood coming out of her eyes, blood coming out of her — wherever.” - Trump

5. Right to equality before the law.

Looks like: a punishment given without proper analysis of evidence.

Sounds like: Brock Turner's trial. "I would never buy Ivana any decent jewels or pictures. Why give her negotiable assets?" - Trump

6. Right to be innocent until proven guilty.

Looks like: accusing women of having malicious intent based on their sex (noun, not verb) alone.

Sounds like: "She's such a whore/slut/bitch" (literal translation: she receives money for sexual acts/engages in sexual activity equivalent to a man/is a female dog). "Women have one of the great [sic] acts of all time. The smart ones act very feminine and needy, but inside they are real killers. The person who came up with the expression ‘the weaker sex’ was either very naive or had to be kidding. I have seen women manipulate men with just a twitch of their eye — or perhaps another body part." - Trump

7. Freedom of opinion.

Looks like:  GASLIGHTING - convincing someone that what they think and believe is inaccurate or wrong to gain power over an individual/group, resulting in doubt of a person's own perception of reality, the most common, subversive and overlooked factor influencing a woman's thoughts and decisions.[18][19][20][21][22][23] 

Sounds like: "You're crazy." "You don't know what you're talking about." "You're overreacting/overemotional." "You aren't seeing it realistically." "You're just being paranoid." "It was a joke!" "I've been doing/saying that; you just haven't seen/heard it." Anything that starts with, "Well, actually..."

• “Cher is somewhat of a loser. She’s lonely. She’s unhappy. She’s very miserable.” - Trump
• “All of the women on ‘The Apprentice’ flirted with me — consciously or unconsciously. That’s to be expected.” - Trump
• "You wouldn't have your job if you weren't beautiful." - Trump
• "Why does she keep interrupting everybody?" - Trump
• "And the girls—we're supposed to call them women, but they're girls to me." - Trump
• "She is a dog who wrongfully comments on me." - Trump
• “My favorite part [of Pulp Fiction] is when Sam has his gun out in the diner and he tells the guy to tell his girlfriend to shut up. Tell that bitch to be cool. Say: ‘Bitch be cool.’ I love those lines.” - Trump

1. Allan Kellehear, MD, "On Death and Dying," Elisabeth Kübler-Ross Foundation, accessed on November 12, 2016, http://www.ekrfoundation.org.
2. 13th, directed by Ava Duvernay (Netflix, 2016), Film.
3. Jo Ann Harris, "1032. Sentencing Enhancements - The Three Strikes Law," United States Department of Justice: Offices of the United States Attorneys, accessed on November 10, 2016, https://www.justice.gov.
4. Meghan Keneally, "What's Inside the Controversial 1994 Crime Bill That's Plaguing Hillary Clinton on the Campaign Trail." ABC News, April 11, 2016 and accessed on October 25, 2016. abcnews.go.com. 
5. Steven Lee Myers, "Use of Unclassified Email Systems Not Limited to Clinton," The New York Times, May 10, 2016 and accessed on October 3, 2016, www.nytimes.com.
6. Matt Apuzo, "Security Logs of Hillary Clinton's Email Server Are Said to Show No Signs of Hacking," The New York Times, March 3, 2016 and accessed on October 3, 2016, www.nytimes.com.
7. Steven Lee Myers, "7 Democrats in Congress Say Clinton Email Inquiry Is 'Too Politicized," The New York Times, March 10, 2016 and accessed on October 3, 2016, ww.nytimes.com.
8. Bill Chappell, "FBI Finishes Hillary Clinton Email Review: 'We Have Not Changed Our Conclusion' Comey Says," National Public Radio, November 6, 2016 and accessed on November 6, 2016, www.npr.org/the-two-way.
9. David Boyer, "Obama Blames Sexism for Hillary Clinton's Woes, Notion She's 'Hiding Something in Email Scandal," The Washington Post, November 1, 2016 and accessed on November 6, 2016, www.washingtonpost.com.
10. Bradford Richardson, "Feminists Defend Hillary Clinton Against 'Sexist' FBI Investigation: 'Bitch Hunt," The Washington Post, October 6, 2016 and accessed on November 6, 2016, www.washingtonpost.com.
11. Daniel Bush, "Election 2016: The Hidden Sexism that Could Sway the Election," PBS Newshour, accessed on November 6, 2016, www.pbs.org/newshour.
12. John Stroehr,"The Sexist Press," US News, September 6, 2016 and accessed on November 6, 2016, www.usnews.com.
13. Robin Lakoff, "Hillary Clinton's Emailgate Is an Attack on Women," Time, October 31, 2016 and accessed on November 6, 2016, time.com.
14. Tory Johnson, "Same Old Story," republished by Debra Condren, "Clinton's Campaign Proves That the Scarlet Letter for 21st Century Women Stands for Ambition," The Huffington Post, last updated May 25, 2016 and accessed on October 4, 2016, www.huffingtonpost.com.
15. Nicolaus Mills, "Scarlet Letter Politics," Dissent Magazine, January 25, 2016 and accessed on November 12, 2016, www.dissentmagazine.org.
16.  Julian Hawthorne, "The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne," The Atlantic April, no. 4 (1886), accessed on November 12, 2016, www.theatlantic.com. 
17. David Horsey, "Hillary Clinton Pays Price for 'Careless' Emails," Los Angeles Times, July 7, 2016 and accessed on November 12, 2016, www.latimes.com.
18. V. Calif and E.M. Weinshel, "Some Clinical Introjections: Gaslighting," The Psychoanalytic Quarterly 50, no. 1 (1981): PMID:7465707
19. Gertrude Zemon Gass and William C. Nichols, "Gaslighting: A Marital Syndrome," Contemporary Family and Therapy 10, no. 1 (1988): 3 - 16, DOI: 10.1007/BF00922429.
20. Kate Abramson, "Turning Up the Lights on Gaslighting," Philosophical Perspectives 28, no. 1 (2014), 1 - 30, DOI: 10.1111/phpe.12046.
21. Macarena Blazquez-Alonso, et al, "Indicators of Psychological Abuse Associated with the Length of Relationships Between Couples," Annals of Psychology 28, no. 3 (2012): 772 - 779, 
    DOI: http://dx.doi.org/10.6018/analesps.28.3.123261.
22. Juan M. Moreno-Manso, et al, "Gender as an Explanatory Factor of Psychological Abuse in Dating Couples, " Journal of Social Service Research 40, no. 1 (2014): 1 - 14, DOI: 
23. http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/01488376.2013.842951.
25. Sharon Hayes and Samantha Jeffries, "Tools and Tactics," Romantic Terrorism: An Auto-Ethnography of Domestic Violence, Victimization, and Survival (2016), 26 - 40, DOI: 10.1057/9781137468499_3.